I don’t like the new chick. She’s one of those icky, talkie, talkie, uber bitch chicks. I dunno. She’s the type of woman you’d see at a bar with a group of friends drinking beer in glasses, listening to Dave Matthews Band, dating a guy who wears khakis and plays golf. Maybe she was a sorority girl in college, but now she’s career girl and is all about being an assertive woman. She just irks me. Maybe the reason why I dislike her right now is that she called me “Val” this morning. I hate that.

She’s just like my boss and the sales rep I dislike, she’s a total sales person. So anyway I was at that tech faire thing with my boss and she, my boss, goes “You notice how Kimberly is just like Rox?” and I’m like “yep, now it’s 3 against 1″… she laughed. It’s so incredibly true.

People are really annoying me today. I dunno what it is. Maybe it’s the fact that they complain and don’t come up with solutions for their complaint or try to do anything about it. Do I do that? Do I complain and whine and then just sit in it? I know that I’ve complained about jobs in the past, or about certain aspects of my jobs and I’ve tried to come up with stuff to fix the problem or make it better. Companies are retarded which is all the more reason to get out and start my own. See I complain about that, about working for other people, about the fact that I don’t want to be copying papers forever, ’cause I’m worth WAY more than that, but yet I have plans on how I’m going to get out of it. At this point its all about money, trying to figure out how to get more. That’s why this whole pay event thing has me concerned about my life here at this company. I shall cut & paste what I wrote to Jamie, to save myself some time.

At work… so get this… April is our “Pay Event” month, which means that it’s the month where they decide if you’re getting a raise or not, or even a pay cut. They compare our jobs to others in our market to see if we’re getting paid too much or not enough, if it’s not enough then they’ll tell our boss that they can give us a raise if they feel its right after evaluating our performance, but if the market is getting paid less than we are then they could actually cut our pay. They did this last year and there was a guy here who was a producer (web site manager/updater person) and they cut his pay so he quit, which is why they hired me… it’s interesting… when I found all of this out it was like a total revelation, it’s like, okay I get it now. Anyway, I’m not too worried about getting a pay cut, although when they hired me they were actually going to pay me less, but I told them I needed to be at the same level I was at at my previous job, so that’s what they gave me… so my thought is maybe that’ll be more than what other “sales assistants” are making, I dunno…its lame… I shouldn’t say that I’m worried about it, because if it happens it’s not the end of the world, I’ll just leave and find another job… the good thing about this job is that I got a bunch of experience using a lot of programs, like Adobe photoshop, illustrator, Dreamweaver… so that ups my stock a little… On the other hand I doubt that if they’re going by the market average or whatever that I’m going to get a raise, I mean if they said yes there’s room for a raise, and it came down to my performance I’d get the raise, but I don’t think that the pay for a sales assistant has gone up but if I’m wrong then whatever… I don’t think it’s fair though, I think a raise should be based on performance in general…

So yea.. back to why this pay event thing has me concerned. So if I just end up staying where I’m at then I’m fucked because I need to be continually moving up in pay every chance I get. So I’ve reposted my shallow personal assistant ads on Craigslist.

Ok, so the new chicky wants to have lunch with me. So freaking annoying… Go sell something, we don’t need to be best buds. UgH! I totally don’t want to have lunch with her. I put her off for now, but I guess I’m going to have to, although we’re having our sales staff meeting on friday, or the “just the girls” meeting as I’m thinking of starting to call it, so maybe we can have a heart to heart then so I don’t have to meet with her alone. Ugh!!! Leave me alone!! If you can see that I don’t want to talk to you, then don’t talk to me. Great.

I’m outta here.. yay

I so do not want to be here today. I REALLY, REALLY do not want to be here today. I’m wearing a damn skirt and “business casual” outfit that I totally dislike because it’s annoying and not comfortable, and I wish I could be in my jeans and sneakers. The only good thing is that everyone is gone right now, so I should be people free until 3pm when I have to go to the tech faire and act like I care. Ugh. I wish I could just quit and start one of the many business ideas that I have right now. UGH!!!!!!

So yesterday I wrote about that guy Joe and how I wrote him back and gave him my phone number. Well he called me this morning around 9 something. It was an interesting conversation because I pretty much thought of him as being a jerk, so I wasn’t all nervous and girly. It was great because I had this whole “I don’t care what happens with this” feeling/vibe/attitude about the whole thing. So that helped to make a better conversation. He’s 28, goes to SFSU, is studying civil engineering and is trying to get his surveyors license or credential or something. He already has his own design business. His office is in Marin and he lives in Tiburon, er he lives there part time? I can’t remember that part exactly but I know he’s super busy with school and work. He used to play water polo and baseball in high school. He’s big on swimming, he’s very “physical” I’m really not putting much in to this guy at all, if I had to bet on which guy I think I’d have the best chances of being with in a relationship it would be Joshua. So anyway we decided to meet up at the Fingertight show next week at Imusicast. Which is kinda weird because I was going to ask Joshua to come with me to that show.

So after we hung up I realized I hadn’t told him I was a “fat chick”, which is something that I like to do because I don’t want anyone to have any false ideas about what I look like. He did see the photo I sent him and he was fine with that, which is great because that photo isn’t the greatest. But of course being the paranoid person that I am I called him back and was like, “dude I’m a fat chick” actually the sentence was a lot longer than that but I had to paraphrase. Anyway, he said something how he saw my picture and didn’t think I looked big, big… and I was like well I’m not a size 6, and he was like size 6 is too small anyway, and I’m like what about a size 8? and he’s like are you a size 8? and I was like no.. then he kept going up and when he got to 14 and I said no I thought it was time to end the conversation, before he got to my actual size. So I told him I’d send him my full body photo so he could see. He didn’t ask for it or anything, but I feel better giving it to him. Gives him a chance to back out if he feels the need. But he did say that I sound like a really great girl that he’d like to meet and get to know. So I dunno, I’m just throwing it out there and seeing what happens. I can’t do anything else.

I wish Joshua would of called me today before I have to leave, which is in half an hour. It would be SOO great if he could come with me to the show tonight, but that’s not happening so I need to get over it. I hope he does call tonight even though I won’t be here to talk to him, at least I’d know that I would get to call him back tomorrow. And then maybe we could meet up tomorrow. That’d be very cool.

Gotta go, I’m late already!

Ok, so I feel better today. Actually last night I was happy and having a good time. Not fretting too much about Joshua. I was very proud of myself for that. And this morning, a few moments after I woke up I checked my email and he had written me. So that was a great thing. He basically just said that his throat is getting better and he’ll call me as soon as he’s up to it. I wanna talk to him sooo badly. Five bucks says he calls me Saturday night while I’m Sacto at the FT show. Grr. I doubt he’d call tonight ’cause he probably isn’t very much better but ya never know.

I’m going to go to the mall after work to get a new shirt of some sort. I haven’t bought any clothes in awhile and all of my “weekend” shirts (as I’ve been calling them lately) have been seen by everybody like fifty million times already. So it’s time for something new. Hopefully Torrid will have something cool. Then I gotta go to Tower to see if they have Her Space Holiday cd’s. Which I’m hoping and praying that they do.

Interesting development. So there’s this other guy that responded to my ad. His name is Joe. Now, I have NO idea if anything will come of this. I’ve seen his picture and he’s a total cutie, so there’s nothing “wrong” with him, yet. So he emailed me awhile back, and I wrote him back, sending him my photo. I didn’t hear from him for long little while, so I just assumed he wasn’t interested in me. So then I get an email from him saying that he was going away on a long weekend but he wanted to say “hi” or something, I don’t remember the exact words. Anyway, so I was like, “ok” and I said more than that in my letter back, but you get the point. Anyway… so today he write me and is like “I’ve been so busy, but I wanted to say “hi” and maybe we could meet up for coffee somewhere in the city?”, so I just wrote him back and gave him my phone number. I don’t feel comfortable at all meeting someone without talking to them first. That’s just me.

Anyway…we shall see what happens.

Ya know, now I have a new idea for a retail clothing store. A small one. A boutique of sorts. I think the fact that when I was walking around downtown walnut creek with Joshua we passed by these little skinny chick boutique shops made me think about it.

Of course my store wouldn’t be for just skinny chicks, it’d have plus-size stuff that can’t find in the mall, the whole theme of the store would be “clothes that you can’t find in a mall”. I kinda stole that from JANE magazine but it’s a great slogan to use for marketing. And there would also be cute kids clothes that you can find everywhere. Like that company that makes that trashtalker shirt I got for Quincy. More stuff like that. I think it would actually do well in Antioch, if it’s in a high foot traffic area, like that new shopping area on Lone Tree. I wouldn’t need a huge space. I would love to put it downtown somwhere ’cause its way cheap but I want people to actually stop by. Ugh.

Ack, that makes me think of that AWESOME space in downtown Pittsburg. I would totally buy all of that space, I think it was like 24,000 sq. ft. for like 30 cents a sq. ft. rent or buy. Ugh. That’d be so awesome. I could live there and run my businesses out of it. But at any rate, I’m going to do a lot of research on the costs involved in running a retail shop. It’s something to do, and an excuse to buy more business related books.

So another work day comes to a close. Yay! Anywhoo… I’m off to get my hair done and try to keep my mind off things that are annoying to think about right now.