missing possibilities

by Valli

I miss looking at someone and seeing all of the possibilities. I’ve only been in that position once and I wasn’t even in love with them yet. Only once have I had that thought that maybe this person is the one I could build a real life with.

I miss being able to think about those things. As I get older the need to feel those things becomes more urgent. There was a great line in the movie “Then She Found Me.” Helen Hunt’s character says, “I want a baby, I can’t explain it, it’s like being hungry or having to pee.”

And so that’s how it is for me. Having kids isn’t something I can take or leave. It’s something that I have to do. It’s something that I don’t want to wait to do either. I know I’m “only 27” but time can go by so fast and I don’t want 10 years to flip by and be 37 and childless. Obviously I really don’t have all that much control over what happens, only to a certain degree, but I can’t make someone love me, hell, I can’t even make them meet me. 🙂

I wonder if I should write and post this kind of stuff here because really anyone can read it. Guys that I could be interested in could read this. And so what if they do? If you can’t handle my honesty then that’s tough for you, plus I’m not going to date just anyone in an attempt to have a kid. I have a plan, and that plan involves falling in love — real love — and getting married and having babies, all in that order.